and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
Damn victory sex feels great
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
