I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
where are my eyebrows?
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize