She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
Randomize