I puked a lego.
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Randomize