I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
Randomize
