so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Randomize
