I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
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