Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
I went 670% over budget on my vacation. My accountant would flip if he weren't me.
How the fuck do you have so much free time?
Polyphasic sleep schedule.
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
Randomize
