He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
Randomize
