i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
You shoulda seen me try and clean up custard from an eclair off the floor while trying to pretend to be sober for my mom. Fucking hilarious.
Randomize
