But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
Public service announcement: if you would like to continue receiving blow jobs, a 25% increase in fuck-giving will be expected immediately, and you're expected to give an actual flying fuck at least once a week. Brought to you by the ad council.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
Randomize
