Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
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