I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
Help me help you realize you are a moron
Randomize
