but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Randomize
