If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
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