i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
The convent might be a nice break from real life
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
I had to cum in my sink.
Randomize
