Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
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