Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
Randomize
