fml, blew my nose and red sprinkles came out and did the splits when i sneezed
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
two words...techno handjob
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
