Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
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