So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
Randomize
