Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
Floor bacon is actually really good
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
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