stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
Next Halloween, remind me to find a different wingman. Walking out in your pirate costume talking like Captain Ahab while i was banging her and telling me I had to harpoon the white whale really pissed her off.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
Randomize
