Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
Randomize