butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
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