I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
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