Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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