but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
My friend's 9-year-old son just informed me that for a cop station, you can't use a shotgun; you have to use a machine gun. Thank you, Grand Theft Auto, for single-handedly corrupting our youth.
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
I AM VODKA MAN
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
Randomize
