adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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