hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
Randomize
