dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
Randomize
