I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Mom found my vibrator. all the said was 'wow, I've never seen one like this before.'
we don't live in the stone age anymore, mom
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
Randomize
