Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Randomize
