he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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