when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
These 25 People Believed Fake Facts For Way Too Long
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
23 Adults Confess The Irrational Fears They Had When They Were Kids
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????