so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
New policy: when a woman uses the word blowjob in a sentence within 5 minutes of meeting her, you buy her a drink.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
