$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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