Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
