Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
Randomize
