wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
I have demons in me.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
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