The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
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