Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
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