what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
Randomize
