Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Randomize