how the fuck am i supposed to make breakfast with spaghettios and mustard
I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Randomize