Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
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