Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Church boner. Awkwardddd
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
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