why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
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He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
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