i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
Randomize