How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
