Texts From Last Night

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  (252): View more from North Carolina

  We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?

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  (252): We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that? http://tfl.nu/z9q7
  Replies (36) Good night (2638) Bad night (558)
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  (917): View more from New York City

  Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee

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  (917): Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee http://tfl.nu/mgtx
  Replies (8) Good night (4964) Bad night (767)
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  (256): View more from Alabama

  Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?

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  (256): Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it? http://tfl.nu/m23f
  Replies (31) Good night (5800) Bad night (597)
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  (512): View more from Texas

  She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!

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  (512): She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them! http://tfl.nu/ovo7
  Replies (20) Good night (6472) Bad night (1174)
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  (316): View more from Kansas

  Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?

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  (316): Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage? http://tfl.nu/r2cg
  Replies (6) Good night (2192) Bad night (1786)
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  (218): View more from Minnesota

  just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.

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  (218): just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high. http://tfl.nu/mss3
  Replies (23) Good night (2408) Bad night (1043)
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  (352): View more from Florida

  She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!

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  (352): She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week! http://tfl.nu/rhq7
  Replies (4) Good night (1825) Bad night (476)
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  (310): View more from California

  Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...

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  (310): Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night... http://tfl.nu/707e
  Replies (15) Good night (3223) Bad night (614)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or

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  (303): ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or http://tfl.nu/vwgc
  Replies (21) Good night (1675) Bad night (797)
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  (505): View more from New Mexico

  Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?

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  (505): Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away? http://tfl.nu/yzva
  Replies (4) Good night (1858) Bad night (404)
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  (917): View more from New York City

  no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom

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  (917): no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom http://tfl.nu/ipdy
  Replies (5) Good night (1018) Bad night (475)
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  (913): View more from Kansas

  I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.

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  (913): I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll. http://tfl.nu/i4my
  Replies (0) Good night (901) Bad night (455)
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  (515): View more from Iowa

  I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month

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  (515): I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month http://tfl.nu/wdkb
  Replies (9) Good night (1112) Bad night (353)
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  I just want nice things and good sex

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  (732): I just want nice things and good sex http://tfl.nu/04u5
  Replies (12) Good night (1075) Bad night (214)
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.

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  (412): we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon. http://tfl.nu/xou6
  Replies (6) Good night (291) Bad night (449)

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